If you are not familiar with bratting, or being a brat in the context of adult BDSM, Spanking or Disciplinary play.
A Brat is a particular flavour of Submissive who, put simply, wants to not just get their punishment, they want to have earned it.
They will be defiant, badly behaved, cheeky, erratic, moody, pouty. Whatever it takes to get their Dominants full attention and get their disciplinary gears grinding.
Quite frankly, I consider Bratting to be a service.
Stay with me….
Some Doms have to analyse their Subs choices and behaviours and make rational decisions based on their findings, then determine the best approach.
A Dom of a Brat, just walks in the room, trips over and goes, “OK, she’s tied my shoelaces together. I’d best undo those and get the wooden spoon.”
We make it easy for them.
So you’re welcome!
I am a Brat, hear me roar! (No wait, that’s something else.)
I am a Brat, and I love it. I don’t know exactly why I steered towards bratting over more traditional submission, but it makes it so much more fun for me, and as it turns out for my husband too.
In everyday life, I enjoy outsmarting people (where possible) and I like being naughty, in a not too offensive way. The fun part is getting reactions for these misdemeanours, normally in the form of a telling off or mild punishment.
Vanilla Example
Friend/Co-Worker/Man at Bus Stop – Do you have the time?
Me – I do, thank you for asking.
Friend/Co-Worker/Man at Bus Stop – Oh, you *shakes head affectionately. Please could you tell me the time.
Me – It’s half 2.
Friend/Co-Worker/Man at Bus Stop – Thank you
*Both parties chuckle heartily.
Now lets transfer that to a Domestic D/s scenario.
Husband – Baby, do you have the time?
Me – I do, thank you for asking.
Husband – Oh, you *shakes head affectionately but also narrows eyes slightly. Please could you tell me the time.
Me – It’s half 2.
Husband – Thank you, wasn’t so difficult was it?
Me – You should have been clearer in your line of questioning.
Husband – Yer-ha *grabs my wrist and pulls me over his knee.
*Both parties chuckle heartily, but under a barrage of slappy noises.
Cute right? Well I think it is.
But Dismay Queen, how can I too instigate this type of fun, playful but highly charged spanking action with my Dominant?
Well firstly, how the hell did you get in my house?
Secondly, Allow me to explain….
For starters, it is worth mentioning every dynamic is different. And that one person’s definition of bratting is another’s definition of just being disrespectful or worse, just being nasty.
Like soft and hard limits, You need to work out with your partner where the lines are between being a bit sassy and actually causing offense or upset.
For us, when I’m being bratty. I’ll be as cheeky and silly as I want, I’ll talk back, be sarcastic, tease and pull the odd practical and/or physical joke at the expense of my husband. Chances are those would result in a spanking, telling off or other punishment, dependant on his mood of course.
Things that I would not do under the guise of “bratting” would include anything personal, (jokes about weight, appearance, emotional response) any practical or physical jokes that have the potential to result in serious hurt or humiliation for my husband and refusal to do any important things in regards to our kids, house or finances.
E.g.
Not loading the dishwasher that evening, when questioned I say “and what?” and stick my tongue out = Bratty
Putting the dirty dishes in our child’s crib as a “joke” for when my husband does bedtime = Not Bratty, just being a dick.
Also, I don’t do tantrums or wild physical challenges.
This is not a boundary or principal thing, I just don’t ever have that kind of energy.
So if you are anything like me, and I hope for your sake you are not. (For I, am an absolute mess.) Bratting is a perfect opportunity to flex your verbal sparring techniques in the absence of any physical prowess.
But Dismay Queen, I am in no way, shape or form as articulate and sparklingly intelligent as you are. How do I even start to Brat verbally at that level?
Well firstly, seriously, how did you get in my house, should I be concerned for my safety?
Secondly, Don’t worry, not many are.
Thirdly, I’m going to go ahead and give you some inspiration, because I’m that kind of person.
Bratting can be exhausting (*pulls out worlds smallest violin and plays a lament for brats everywhere), and coming up with witticisms and snappy one liners can be tricky when you are tired and/or getting your butt shredded with a belt.
So here are my favourite ways of bratting (primarily) verbally, along with some lines and examples you can use from the comfort of your own home.
Sarcasm (Well placed and subtle)
I’ve added the brackets because pure sarcasm can start to grate, and not in a good way. I find this one is a really good instigator, it gets his palms twitching and acts as a nice little chequered flag to show I’m in the mood for a spanking.
The key to subtlety is to be deadpan about it. For example;
BeardFace is playing a computer game, he is currently in last place out of 60 players.
BF: I think I might lose this.
DQ: *Deadpan and monotone – You reckon?
BF:…………… *gives the look
The spanking wheels in his head are probably turning right about now.
Whereas;
BeardFace is playing a computer game, he is currently in last place out of 60 players.
BF: I think I might lose this.
DQ: *mock derpy voice – Oooooohhhhh do you think so genius? Really you think the player in 60th place will come last? Well lets just see if that is what happens, oh my god its so tense!
BF:…………… – What the hell is wrong with you? Do I need to call an exorcist?
You see what I mean about subtlety, with sarcasm I always find less is more.
And more equals more spanking!
We’ve already handled how to react when he is being Captain Obvious, but other areas you can utilise your subtle sarcasm are as follows;
When he gives a warning to you, but then slips up himself.
BF: Take your cup out to the kitchen, don’t just leave it on the sofa.
DQ: Fine! *takes out the cup huffily.
*Later that day, the dog is found licking tea out of a cup on the sofa.
BF: Did the dog get hold of my cup!?
DQ: Well, he got hold of A cup, but it couldn’t have been yours, because you would never leave it on the sofa.
BF: OK, upstairs!
*DQ goes upstairs huffily.
He makes an inaccurate prediction.
BF: We should probably head back, it looks like it’s about to start pouring down.
*DQ and BF head back to car.
*Hours of glorious sunshine later.
BF: Car’s looking a bit dirty.
DQ: Yeah, it’s weird that it didn’t get cleaned in that downpour of torrential rain we had…..
BF: Yeah that is weird, *unloops belt from trousers.
Being Cheeky/Sassy
I mean this is just bread and butter for brats right? It’s a bit when manufacturers write “may contain nuts” on a bag of peanuts. Well duh!
So I won’t bang on about it, but as with my sarcasm I like to keep it smart and subtle. Here are some to grow on;
I’m over his knee about to get spanked.
BF: Okay you are getting 50 and I’m not gonna go easy.
*BeardFace starts spanking, he gets about 20 in…
DQ: Are you gonna let me know when you start?
I love being cheeky when already over his knee, because you will normally get a pause in action followed closely by an exasperated sigh.
That noise is like catnip for Brats!
Bratnip!
*pats self on back.
You are watching TV in the lounge, he is upstairs.
DQ: *Shouts, Could you turn the heating back on, please?
BF: *Shouts, Could I what?
DQ: *Shouts Turn the heating back on, please?
BF: *Shouts Turn the what?
DQ: *Shouts Heating back on, please?
BF: *Shouts I can’t hear you and I don’t want to keep shouting through walls like this!
DQ: *Shouts Good idea, you can come down here then!
*He heard that fine.
And the radiators are soon not the only things emitting heat.
Public Squirming Opportunities
This one doesn’t come up too often during a pandemic, but it’s always been a guilty pleasure of mine. To have a little in-joke between the 2 of you, and especially effective if you are in the company of non-Spankos.
Examples;
In a friends kitchen.
DQ: That’s a nice set of spatulas.
Friend: Thank you.
DQ: We need a set like that, ours keep breaking.
Friend: How the hell do you break a spatula?
*BF stares and shakes his head at me.
DQ: Not sure, just accident prone.
*BF exhales, but give the “wait till I get you home face”
At a restaurant.
BF: Can we order the steak please.
Waiter: Of course Sir, how would you like that done?
BF: What cuts are there?
Waiter: We have T-bone, Sirloin or Rump.
DQ: Oooo, I’d like the Rump rare please. Like bright red!
BF: *Looks at me knowingly – Yeah rare Rump sounds good to me.
Loopholes and Outsmarting
Saving the best till last. In my opinion.
I love thinking my way out of a problem.
No one likes to be outsmarted. I wouldn’t know as its never happened to me personally, but I hear it’s not great for the ego.
So lets do it!
Loopholes in rule breaking
BF: Don’t eat all the cookies.
DQ: Of course not.
*DQ eats all but one of the cookies. BF presents an almost empty bag to DQ.
BF: Care to explain?
DQ: I didn’t eat all of them.
BF: Fair enough, well I’ll put this last cookie in the middle of the dining table. If you want it you’ll need to bend over and eat it at the table.
DQ: OK! *runs excitedly to the cookie.
Because Dismay Queen cares more about cookies than consequences!
Correcting Grammar, Spelling etc..
BF: Could you bring me my shoe, please?
DQ: How are you spelling shoe?
BF: What? Why? Doesn’t matter.
*DQ goes and returns with 2 profiteroles.
BF: Huh?
DQ: You wanted your Choux?
*BF puts me in the corner, whilst he eats the profiteroles and fetches his own shoe.
Reinterpreting the Question (see also the “do you have the time?” example)
BF: Have you seen my jacket?
DQ: Yes.
BF: Where?
DQ: On the hook, on your body, in the back seat of the car….
BF: I meant where is it currently?
DQ: How should I know?
BF: You said you’d se…… Oh, OK.
*Later that night.
DQ: Did you find your jacket?
BF: No talking from the corner!
If you want to add some garnish to these verbal canapés.
Some good physical examples are…..
Hey! You said this was all verbal and no physical excursion would be required!
Well Firstly, Why are you still here! I’ve called the police, they will be here any minute.
Secondly, I promise you the physical excursion is minimal. Otherwise there is no way I would publicly endorse them.
Eye Rolling – A brats eyeballs can be compared to a compulsive smoker. In that they are constantly rolling up. It’s a subtle way of saying “you are boring me now” or “whatever!” and it rarely goes unnoticed.
Poking or Tickling – Again, keep it mild or it will just be annoying. BeardFace gets squirmy when being lightly touched, so it’s an easy way to get a quick telling off. It can also be a good way to get them in the mood, depending where you choose to poke or tickle.
Teasing – I could put trousers on, or I could just walk around the house in just a vest top and panties with the under curve of my butt on show.
I could tidy the bookshelf in front of me, or I could tidy the one right at the bottom so I need to bend over right in front of him.
I could turn sideways to scooch past him in the kitchen, or I could turn round the other way and brush everything against him as I pass.
Of course if at any point I get stopped and asked if I’m doing this deliberately, I give him the most innocent look I can muster and plead ignorance.
I then get to walk around the house in just a vest top and panties with the under curve of my bright red butt on show.
Giggling – Not really something you do consciously, but being giggly during a punishment or telling off is normally only going to end badly for me. However, if you can get them giggling with you, they may just think you are far too cute to go hard on that night. Just a quick OTK then a hot chocolate and cuddle it is.
However you choose to Brat, remember to have fun with it. Just ensure your top is having fun with it too.
Timing is everything, make sure you read the room before firing up the Brat cylinders. Even the gooiest brat loving of doms just sometimes just really don’t need that shit right now.
And you know, if you are not too fussed with the “it’s the right thing to do” angle sometimes being the perfect partner can still get you a good girl/boy spanking? So there’s that.
And remember, if asked “Are you doing this deliberately?”
You can’t lie to your Dom, that’s just wrong, right?
You say “Sure am, what are you going to do about it?”
They will respect your honesty………. I assume.
Brat safe out there.
Disclaimer: You didn’t hear this from me. If any Doms come for me, I will burn this blog and deny everything.
Jotting from the Bottom 